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Uncle Jack May 30, 2011

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I have admired Gary Sinese’s acting for several years. He played Lt. Dan in Forest Gump with great sensitivity and power.

Now, he has given his Uncle a very remarkable Memorial Day, documented in this video.

I got this from my very good friend Paul. We went to a military boy’s high school near Aurora, Il, a few years ago.

For some reason, I can’t load the video into the blog as I usually do, so please click here.

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Remember… May 29, 2011

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Good News from New Zealand May 27, 2011

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Three Hastings (NZ) schoolboys rescued a 12-year-old girl by threatening to attack two men who were trying to drag her away.

“The other boys told them that if they didn’t go away right now they would get a hiding,” Hastings Boys’ High School pupil Liam Mataira, 15, said yesterday, describing the rescue he had made with friends Ben Hayllar and Tama McKenzie.
(more…)

How Bad Is This? May 26, 2011

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We are still in a search-and-rescue mode,” said Mark Rohr, Joplin’s city manager. “I want to emphasize that.

Missy Epperson heads a team of 13 volunteers and rescue dogs from Illinois. She also searched for victims at World Trade Center after the Sept. 11, 2001, terror attacks and after Hurricane Katrina struck New Orleans in 2005.

“This is Katrina without the water,” Epperson told CBS News correspondent Don Teague.

——————

Missy (we wouldn’t make up a name like that) might have also said:

“This is the Titanic without the iceberg.”

Or

“This is 9/11 without the jet planes.”

Or

“This is World War II without the Germans.”

Or

“This is Watergate without Richard Nixon.”

(Well, maybe not the last one.)

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How Forest Gump Should Have Ended May 25, 2011

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How Braveheart Should Have Ended May 25, 2011

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How Lord of the Rings Should Have Ended May 25, 2011

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Well-Written Police Report May 23, 2011

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From the police report:

“Orville Smith, a store manager for Best Buy in Augusta , Georgia , said he observed a male customer, later identified as Tyrone Jackson of Augusta , on surveillance cameras putting a laptop computer under his jacket. When confronted the man became irate, knocked down an employee, drew a knife and ran for the door.

“Outside on the sidewalk were four Marines collecting toys for the “Toys for Tots” program. Smith said the Marines stopped the man, but he stabbed one of the Marines, Cpl. Phillip Duggan, in the back. The injury did not appear to be serious.

“After Police and an ambulance arrived at the scene, Cpl. Duggan was transported for treatment. The subject was also transported to the local hospital with two broken arms, a broken ankle, a broken leg, several missing teeth, possible broken ribs, multiple contusions, assorted lacerations, a broken nose and a broken jaw, injuries he sustained when he slipped and fell off the curb after stabbing the Marine.”

Now that’s a well-written police report.

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Yep, They’re HERE! May 23, 2011

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They Walk Among Us and Many Work Retail

I was at the checkout of a K-Mart. The cashier rang up $46.64 charges. I gave her a fifty dollar bill. She gave me back $46.64. I gave the money back to her and told her that she had made a mistake in MY favor.

She became indignant and informed me she was educated and knew what she was doing, and returned the money again. I gave her the money back; same scenario!
I departed the store with my stuff and with the $46.64.

They Walk Among Us and Many Work Retail

I walked into a Starbucks with a buy-one-get- one-free coupon for a Grande Latte. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little chalkboard that said ‘buy one-get one free.’ ‘They’re already buy-one- get-one-free, ‘ she said, ‘so I guess they’re both free’. She handed me my free Lattes and I walked out the door.

They Walk Among Us!

One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when one of them shouted, ‘Look at that dead bird!’

Someone looked up at the sky and said, ‘Where?’

They Walk Among Us!

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn’t want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, ‘Does the sun rise in the North?. When my brother explained that the sun rises in the East, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, ‘Oh I don’t keep up with all that stuff.’

They Walk Among Us!

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, ‘The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.’ He responded, ‘Is that Eastern or Pacific time?’ Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, ‘Uh, Pacific.’

They Walk Among Us!

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk.

They Walk Among Us!

My friends and I went out to buy beer and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.

They Walk Among Us!

I couldn’t find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. ‘Now,’ she asked me, ‘has your plane arrived yet?’

They Walk Among Us!

While working at a pizza place I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. ‘Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don’t think I’m hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.’

Yep, They Walk Among Us!

They Walk Among Us, and they Reproduce

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Kiting May 22, 2011

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Kiting

i had many titles

best one now is kite

paper sticks string

a tie for a tail

when i am a kite,

all is silent
can’t hear the thoughts of
who told me to go, take care

going without silence is not,
so silence is final and necessary

no scent no sound
hardly a tie to the earth

i did what you said to do,
take care

what could have been
what should have been
why waste the time

can I soar if you drop the string?

kiting.

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