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Global Warming Hoax December 30, 2010

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There Is Never Any Global Warming Around When You Need It December 28, 2010

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Quote: Heaviest December Snows in Six Decades to Further Disrupt New York Commute

Yes, I do want to speak to Mr. Al Gore right now. Well, then, please tell him that we want to ask him some questions about his “global warming”, and when exactly it will kick in?

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Joe Biden Says Gay Marriage Is Inevitable December 24, 2010

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Well, not if you stay out of that kind of bar, Joe.

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Gee, Ya Think? December 24, 2010

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“If he was to be held in a general prison population in the U.S., however, Assange speculated there was a “high chance” he’d be killed extra-judicially by a third party actor he likened to Jack Ruby, the man who killed alleged JFK shooter Lee Harvey Oswald two days after he was arrested.” by Tucker Reals, CBS News

Well, I don’t know. Maybe he can buy some life insurance.

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People Just Think That GM Has a Minor Problem December 23, 2010

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General Motors, which got out of bankruptcy quickly, re-paid the Feds quickly and says “Everythingisjustpeachynowthanks” quickly is recalling 100,000 cars for what are described as two problems.

Sometimes the rear axle comes loose, and sometimes the passenger side airbag doesn’t work.

Actually, it’s one combined problem, called “The Middle Aged Marriage Option (MAMO)”.

About 99.9% of male drivers resent their wives giving opinions, directions, instructions, or even conversation while they are driving. GM put in a fix: slide the floor mat unobtrusively, and the rear axle comes loose, makes an arc and flies into the passenger seat from above. Then, the passenger air bag inflates at about mach 2, combining the axle and the former passenger into – well, it ain’t pretty. But problem solved.

GM is making huge profits on installing new axles, new air bags and of course new passenger side seats. In by nine, out by noon.

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Well, It Coulda Been Worse December 23, 2010

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Wikileaks’ Secret Cache Leaked
ABC World News, Dec. 22, 2010 by Devin Dwter

Norwegian paper could publish secret documents independent of Julian Assange.

“Norway’s main business newspaper reported Wednesday that the Aftenposten news service has obtained unfettered and unauthorized access to the entire cache of secret government documents held exclusively by Wikileaks and its founder, Julian Assange.

“If true, Aftenposten would be the only international news organization to have direct possession of the entire trove of U.S. diplomatic cables and military records believed to have been originally leaked by U.S. Army Private Bradley Manning.

“The paper does not reveal who leaked the documents from inside Wikileaks’ operations.

“I have no comments on how we have secured access to the documents. We never give our sources, even in this case,” Aftenposten news editor Ole Erik Almlid told the paper Dagens Naerings, according to a rough translation of his comments, which were in Norwegian.

“Until now, Wikileaks has selectively released roughly 2,000 of the more than quarter million controversial documents, disseminating them to the general public through a handful of news organizations, including The New York Times, Guardian and Der Spiegel newspapers.”

Well, it COULD have been worse. They could be publishing it in English. It won’t be too bad in Norwegian. How many people do YOU know who speak Norwegian?

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Christmas Efficiency December 21, 2010

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from Crosswalk.com

A kindly 90-year-old grandmother found buying presents for family and friends a bit much one Christmas, so she wrote out checks for all of them to put in their Christmas cards.

In each card she wrote, “Buy your own present” and then sent them off.

After the Christmas festivities were over, she found the checks in her desk.

Everyone had gotten a Christmas card from her with “Buy your own present” written inside, but without the check.

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Technology Advance December 18, 2010

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Big freeze falls on Europe. (CNN) A blast of harsh winter weather socked Europe today, causing travel chaos and sending temperatures into a deep-freeze. “

Thank goodness for global warming. Imagine how cold it would be without it!

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Those Whose 15 Minutes Of Fame Have Expired December 17, 2010

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Please add your ignobleites to this list. I am sure that we can break 50 well-known bores whom we are thoroughly tired of, without breaking a sweat.

Those Whose 15 Minutes Of Fame Have Expired

Armand Assange

Anybody whose last name is Palin

Larry King or any two of his eight wives

Charlie Sheen

Gwyneth Paltrow

Michael Moore

Kim Jong Il

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Christmas Mix December 13, 2010

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